“First things first, you gotta smell good.”

“First things first, you gotta smell good.”

“Honesty is the best policy. If you’re telling the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”

“Men need to have sex to feel good but women need to feel good to have sex.”

“Take a woman to a hot tub and share a steak with her in the hot tub.”

“If you’re gonna cheat, cheat out of state.”

“Work your strategy over time to get them to agree with you.”

“Be a gentleman and carry her handbag.”

“Lie when you have to.”

“Be nice to all the women that you meet, they might have friends.”

“The dress is being done a favor by being on her.”

“When your significant other is talking, they may not want your feedback. They may just want to vent.”

“Even if you don’t feel like saying you’re sorry, say it anyways.”

“Run your fingers through her hair, and tell her how lucky you are to have her in your life.”

“If you want love, don’t live in LA.”

“Don’t give your girlfriend a huge Valentine’s Day the first time, because then you’ve got to match it.”

“Swedish women are a lot more beautiful.” “Stay away from Swedish-born women.”

“Laugh with the person you love at least once a day.”

“Earn money. Money can buy happiness. Money can buy love.”

“There are two times when a man should enter a door before a woman…”

“It’s okay to go to bed angry at each other.”

“If you show love, you feel love.”

“Find out what she really wants to know or hear, and just agree.”

“Shave your balls. You never know what situation you’ll be in.”

“No one’s perfect. The trick is finding the flaw that you want that person to have.”

“Do something little each day to let her know that you’re involved.”

“Lower your standards. It broadens the playing field.”

“Study and understand the vagina fully.”

“Never underestimate the appeal of a good hat.”

“Don’t have a cell phone at all.”

“If you can pick up an instrument, if you’re not bad at it, you’re in.”

“It may take five or ten years to really trust somebody.”

“It’s bad form to ask a girl out via text.”

“Give the woman a chance to miss you.”

“Before you tell them anything about yourself, you’ve got to nail them hard and give it to them good.”

“If you’re a single guy, and you’re not going to yoga classes, you’re really stupid.”

“Master the art of being around that person and not talking.”

“Don’t ever, ever rely on your friends to hook you up with other people.”

“Let her pick, and rub her feet.”

“Lie. And never admit that you’re lying. Go to any absurd lengths to cover your tracks.”

“Ask women to teach you because love is a mystery for men.”

“Keep them surprised. Show up with flowers every now and then.”

“Girls really like to watch their man clean.”

“Don’t be afraid to eat p*$$y.”

“Be as big a goon and as big a geek and nerd as you are. Don’t hide anything.”

“Never assume a pretty woman has a boyfriend. She might be available.”

“Talk to them as though you already know them.”

“Make sure you’re both on the same page. If you have the same views, everything should be good.”

“Compliment your woman. They love that. Start with the shoes.”

“You can feel a lot of emotion through a hug. Hugs say a lot.”

“Tell her that you want to enjoy her intellectually before you ever enjoy her sexually.”

“If there’s a problem, send flowers.”

“A little visual reminder like that could work…”

“When you look at somebody, you know within the first five seconds whether you’re going to sleep with them.”

“Sometimes I agree, and I don’t even know what I’m agreeing with.”

“Get her really mad. I mean really, really mad.”

“It’s the smallest gestures that are going to make the biggest difference.”

“Learn to cook.”

“If you want to make it last…”