The Man's Guide To Love

a catalog of honest, brutal, thoughtful, smart advice. served daily. man to man.


Leading up to Father’s Day, we’re sharing a full week devoted to the lessons in love that sons have received from their fathers, that men have learned from their children. Some advice is funny, some sad, some profound — all are 100% honest life and love lessons passed down from one generation to another. Welcome to Father’s Week.

“Advice from Dad” has been one of the major themes of The Man’s Guide To Love so far in its short history. If you go to our tag cloud, you can find our whole collection on the theme. You can’t help learn lessons from your dad — whether it’s what to do or what to avoid.

I (Mark, one of the creators of the site) lost my father a year ago this summer. He was born in 1930 and died in 2009 at the age 78. He amazingly made it all the way to 2009 without ever having an email account or even really having a computer. Watching the way he let technology pass him by was one of the things that inspired us to create The Man’s Guide To Love. I thought there before the grace of God goes I. I didn’t want to draw a line in the sand saying “even as the world keeps moving forward, I’m content to stay right here.” We had never created anything for the internet, which is really the medium of our generation. So, inspired by my father, we set out to create something in the vernacular of our times: The Man’s Guide To Love. Thank you, dad. For the inspiration, the kick in the pants, and for all the love you gave me my whole life. This is me passing the love along.

How do we collect MGL’s?

Heading out to shoot interviews is a lot like going fishing. You go out, usually alone, and you see what you catch. You don’t want to go someplace where people are walking briskly past, where they are on their way to someplace else. Men on their way somewhere tend not to want to stop and get philosophical about love. Better to be where men are sitting, contemplating, if possible separate from their families or loved ones — that’s why there are interesting ones at airports. The beach is also very good. Ditto the train station. I find it’s best just to have your camera with you all the time, as you never know where the good ones might turn up.

My name is Mark and I’m one of the five members of the MGL team who head out into the world and gather MGL’s. A couple weeks ago, I was in Los Angeles at a trapeze class with my daughter (yes, she takes trapeze) and my wife says, “hey, I think that guy over there is Jeff Probst.” Now, we have been Survivor fans since the first season. I instinctively picked up my camera and immediately went over and said, “hey, we’re doing this project called ‘The Man’s Guide To Love’ where we’re asking men all over the country for advice…” Without a moment’s hesitation, Jeff kindly obliged. It’s always amazing how eager most men are to offer advice on the subject.

Now, you never know the quality of the advice you’re going to get. Sometimes guys you think will be great and profound are often just so-so. We here at The Man’s Guide To Love find it’s about a 6 to 1 ratio of “interviews” to “really compelling interviews that get on the site.” So I didn’t necessarily know if Jeff Probst would be a good one, but I had a feeling. And sure enough he had something interesting to say. We hear a lot about being honest in our interviews — it’s one of our major themes — but I think Jeff explained why honesty is the best policy very succinctly and with a sense of humor. Thank you, Jeff.

“I hate that it is what it is…

…but it is what it is.” Those words were spoken by a 26-year-old named Chuck in Venice, California a few weeks ago. When we at the MGL first saw his “Be Ruthless” speech, we felt like we had encountered a modern poet on the theme of love. There are five of us who go out there and ask the question and curate the site. We started out thinking we would be posting on this blog a lot, but we’ve come to understand the men on the site are the real voice of the MGL. Frankly, our words pale in comparison. So thanks, Chuck, for the words and the wisdom, and thanks to all the men up on the big board. We’ll definitely keep posting over here on the blog, but mostly we’ll keep listening to all of you on the front page.


Sometimes a wise man has more than one thing to say. That’s why we created our special B-SIDES category — a bonus treat for true MGL followers. A B-SIDE is a second piece of advice from a man who showed up on the front page of the site, but who just wouldn’t stop talking. The first B-SIDE comes from John, 50 — a man who’s been divorced and happily remarried, father of four, and he knows at least a couple things about love. He explains how “you’re not doing her any favors.” To check out John’s awesome B-SIDE, click here.

Upon seeing The Man’s Guide to Love…

…a friend from Los Angeles writes:

“Dear Man’s Guide To Love,
It’s called Medicinal Marijauna for a reason. Key word, Medicinal, to be taken when needed. I am very concerned with you and your compatriots roaming the country like Armenian Gypsy’s spreading the love and the occasional Palm Reading. As I closely review the website, I will determine if any action needs to be taken. We all know the Man’s Guide to Love is a down to earth stripper who likes sports, loves to cook and believes in the Lord Jesus Christ our Savior.
I Said Good Day Sir!!!!!!!

We love it when Joe writes in. Keep the letters coming, Joe.

The Man’s Guide To Love Project

“What’s the one piece of advice you’d give to other men on the subject of love?”  It started with one question.  So far we’ve collected a thousand answers. For the last few months, we’ve been traveling around the country asking men of all ages, all backgrounds, that simple question.  Giant themes have emerged: “be honest,” “compromise,” “be yourself”, “love yourself,” “vigorously nod your head in agreement with your woman.”  But what has been most incredible is actually engaging in a completely candid dialogue about a subject that men rarely talk about: love.  How to find it, how to keep it, how to avoid it — whatever a man wants to say, we listen.  What has blossomed is an ever-growing catalog of sometimes funny, sometimes touching, sometimes practical, always brutally honest advice from man to man.   Seven days a week, we’re going to post their responses.

Leave a comment.  Go to our drop down menu where it says “What’s your advice?” and share some of your own wisdom on the subject.  Maybe something your father told you.  Something you might tell your buddy or your son.  Share lessons you learned the hard way.  Women can comment, listen, laugh, scream and shout at us as well.  We just want to talk about love.  Openly.  Honestly.  And hopefully, we’ll all learn a thing or two along the way.

Spread the love.